Where School Sucks and Magic Explodes
by Life-Drawing-Wizard
Summary: Welcome to Hetalia International Academy! Many things make Alice strange but namely, the fact that she can see magical creatures. When her new found friends start seeing things too, we all wonder just what, exactly, Lars has been giving them. Rated T for one moody Italian, an awesome Prussian and a pervy Frenchie! UsUk PruCan Spamano Gerita DenNorg TurGre SwisLeich PolLith and more
1. Kirkland

A/N: _So, this will be a multi-chapter fic. How long, I really don't know. I also don't know who, exactly, is the main character. Hmm..._

_Well, I tried something different, and I'm_ flipping_ my genderbending! So that means fem!Prussia, fem!France, fem!Spain, the lot! Sorry if it comes out...weird._

* * *

**Kirkland**

Alice Kirkland is an interesting girl, and there are several things you needed to know before meeting her.

She's blonde.

She has the most startlingly green eyes you'll ever see.

Her favorite movie is Peter Pan (it has been since she was six)

She has four extremely over-protective older brothers.

And an older sister, but she is in college.

She has an incredibly short temper.

She can get drunk from a shot glass.

She loathes Frani Bonnefoy with a burning passion.

She really hates his second cousin, Peter.

She believes in fairies.

And unicorns.

And leprechauns.

And flying mint bunnies.

That's right. Flying. Mint. Bunnies.

Which is why, on one particular September the first, Alice was woken not by an alarm, but a tiny voice.

"Wake up! Wake up, sleepy head!"

"Wha-?" Alice drawled, prying her eyelids open, "Tink-?"

A small elfish face scowled at her, "Wake up, Alice! It's almost time for school!"

Alice sat up on her elbows staring at the pixie, before she noticed the group of four or five pixies surrounding her.

"What's the rush, guys?" she asked sleepily, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"Allistar's coming!" one of them exclaimed.

Quicker than should have been humanly possible, Alice was fully dressed; hair brushed and pulled back in twin ponytails, glasses firmly in place, and was pulling open the door when a tall, red haired boy was coming to the top of the stairs.

"Morning, Scottie," Alice said pleasantly, smiling at her eldest brother.

"Dammit," the boy cursed, "Cai, Eily, you can come out now. She's already awake."

Alice watched as her twin brothers came out of their hiding places, both baring buckets of what Alice assumed was ice water.

Alistar Kirkland (or 'Scottie' as his siblings call him) was a senior in high school, tall, with long, flaming red hair that was forever falling in his eyes. His eyes were a dark green, he had two earrings in both ears, and he was wearing multiple Celtic necklaces above the open collar of his school shirt.

Cailean and Eilven were juniors, identical twins, and the third oldest in the family, and at least a head taller than Alice. Both had red hair like Alistar, but not nearly as bright orange or bushy. Their crystal blue eyes sparkled with mischief, and both sported identical Irish knot necklaces.

The last Kirkland boy, Dylan, was in the kitchen making breakfast. Of all the family, Dylan was really the only one who sort of resembled Alice. He had the same straw colored hair, and the same sort of bushy eyebrows, but that was where the similarities ended. Where Alice's eyes were a vivid green, his were a murky navy. And while Alice's skin was a milky cream color, Dylan's was slightly tanner from all the time he spent laying around outside and gardening.

"Would ya hurry it up?" asked a testy voice from one of the barstools.

"Sod off," Cai and Alice said in unison to the short bearded man on the barstool.

"Is Patrick being an ass again?" Alistar asked as he sat down.

"Yup," Cai said, sitting down next to Alistar, "A right Irish ass."

"I've told you two," Eily sighed as he sat on the other side of his twin, "Just ignore the bitchy ones. They go away eventually."

"No smoking in the kitchen," Alice reminded her eldest brother as she smacked his hand, causing him to drop the cigarette he had been about to light, "And Patrick isn't a bitchy one. He's just a stubborn arsehole who doesn't know how to take a hint."

"I'm right here," the Leprechaun in question said testily.

"We know," Cai said, glaring at Patrick.

This was a ritual of sorts at the Kirkland house, insulting Patrick every morning. The siblings had gotten lazy over the summer, but now that school was here they needed to be sure to crack down.

"So, why'zit again that only you and Cai can see 'em?" Alistar asked, not for the first time.

"Well, Eily _used _to see 'em," Cai said slowly, glancing at his twin, "But I think he just stopped…wanting too."

Eily shrugged, not bothering to deny the fact, "They were a right pain in the ass. Sometimes I can hear them again, but I just pretend they're not there and they go away."

Alice sighed dejectedly at her older brother's lack of enthusiasm when it came to magical creatures.

"Just because you don't _want _to see them," Alice said, "Doesn't mean they aren't there. They're still trying to get your attention, you know."

"They're a pain to listen to when we're taking a test or something," Cai added, "Then I look like a loon when I tell them to shove it."

"You four better hurry up," Dylan said from his position by the stove, "We need to leave soon."

In no time, the five siblings had devoured their breakfast and were heading out the door, slinging bags over shoulders, grabbing keys and jackets, and chattering amiably.

Once they had all loaded into Alistar's truck, the group was ready to head off.

"Where are you going, again?" asked one of the pixies.

"School," Cai told the pixie.

To anyone who couldn't see or hear the pixie, this must have seemed like an extremely random outburst. However, the Kirkland children were more than accustomed to Cai and Alice's random comments or conversations to seemingly thin air.

"What's school?" the same pixie asked.

"A hell hole that people are forced to attend when their assholes of parents relent," Alistar responded.

Alice looked in astonishment at her older brother, "How did you know how to respond?"

Alistar shrugged, "From Cai's comment, I guessed what the conversation was."

"Ouch! What was that for?" Eily demanded, glaring at a spot slightly over Cai's shoulder, while he laughed.

"It wasn't me!" Cai gasped, "It was the pixie!"

"Why you little liar!" Eily exclaimed, diving at his twin.

Alistar laughed from the driver's seat, occasionally saying things like, "Keep it down if you like your faces the way they are!" and other violent things.

Alice had started a conversation with a very confused pixie. Dylan just watched the buildings pass them by out the passenger window.

When Alistar finally pulled up to the school, he parked, and turned around in his seat to face the others.

"Kay, Kirk-kids, you know the drill," he said authoritatively, preparing for his version of the speech. Usually their 'yearly speech' was given by the eldest child. But because the oldest Kirkland, Erinn, was starting her freshman year of college, the job now fell to Alistar. And the next year, when Alistar was in college, the job would be the twins. Alice shuddered at the thought.

"School ends at three thirty, so be by the truck at four," he started, "No sooner, no later. We'll discuss hitching rides when the time comes. Now…Alice…"

All four brothers, even Dylan, turned to their younger sister.

Alice rolled her eyes and sighed audibly, "If there are any arses that try to hurt me or pick me up, alert you immediately. If I have bitch problems, alert Frani. And if Frani tries to grope me, knee her in the gut."

Since her brothers were still staring at he skeptically, Alice sighed again, "Bloody hell, you four. I'm not a toddler. I've done this before."

"Yeah," Cai said slowly, looking at his twin for help.

"But never in _high school_ before," Eily finished.

"If you need anything-" Dylan added.

"Anything at all," Alistar pressed.

"-Don't hesitate to call us."

"You know the 'a teacher needs you' drill," Alistar reminded.

Alice had to restrain herself from face palming.

"Guys," Alice said, "You don't need to be so bloody over-protective all the time. I promise I'll call you if someone tries to rape me."

Eily shrugged, "Hey, it's our job as brothers to be over-protective."

"We're going to be late if we don't start heading off now," Dylan prompted.

The Kirkland children all unloaded and Alistar locked the car, causing it to make a loud honking noise.

Then they all separated to find friends, and Alice was alone.

_Welcome to high school_, she sighed to herself. Hefting her bag on her shoulder, Alice quickly ascended the stairs and pushed into what would undoubtedly be a four-year hell-hole.

And was immediately bowled over by a speeding figure.

Alice straightened, an annoyed look creasing her features as the boy who had just slammed into her.

He was a dirty blonde, his hair just a shade darker than Alice's own. His silver rimmed glasses were askew in front of crystal blue eyes. Oddly enough, he was wearing a bomber jacket over his school uniform shirt, and Alice was fairly certain that she spotted combat boots poking out from beneath his plaid school pants.

He didn't _seem_ to notice Alice. Well…more like he just plain didn't notice her.

"Hey!" A voice shouted, "Get back here, you ass! Dammit, GET BACK HERE!"

The boy who had crashed into Alice was laughing in a loud, obnoxious, way that made her want to smack him. She settled with yelling at him.

"Oi!" she shouted up at him, "Don't just go barreling down the hallway like a dimwitted arse! You nearly bowled me over, git! You bloody well might have hurt me and then where would we be?"

"Oh," the boy said after a second, seeming to just notice Alice, "Hi there! What're you doing there?"

Alice could feel her blood boiling, "Arse! You just ran into me!"

The boy looked momentarily perturbed at this last statement, "I did?"

"Yes! You bloody well did!" Alice exclaimed, glad to be making some progress.

"Well, sorry about that," the boy said pleasantly, flashing her a Colgate toothpaste smile that could have given a blind man a headache, "I'm Alfred F. Jones, the hero!, nice to meet you!"

"Alice Kirkland," Alice snapped curtly.

But just then, the voice from earlier, accompanied by a white haired girl, ruby eyes smoldering, caught up with the hero.

"You bastard!" she exclaimed, "You think you can just insult my awesomeness and get away with it?!"

"Sorry!" Alfred said innocently, maintaining his blinding smile, but raising his arms in defense, "I didn't mean it, honest! It was just Mattie was-"

At this statement, a thought seemed to occur to him and he said, "Mattie! Dammit! Sorry, gotta run! See ya, Alice!" and he ran off down the hall, nimbly avoiding the passing students.

"Bloody hell was that?" Alice blurted.

"Be damned if I know," the girl shrugged, "He's a right asshole though. I should probably go find West. Awesome, out."

And with a backwards salute, the albino girl was gone.

"That was…" Alice searched for the right word, "Strange…to say the least."

Checking her schedule, Alice found her first class, **Home Ec**, and headed off in the direction of the room number.


	2. Vargas

A/N: _Second chapter! Now it's our dear little Lovi's turn. Hooray! Have I mentioned that I don't own Hetalia in any way? Well, I don't. If I did, Romano would be the main character and the whole series would probably explode in cracky fluffiness and nobody would be happy. Except maybe me..._

_Oh, and there is a reason that Lovi doesn't like Spanish. Which shall be revealed...at a later date. MWAHAHA!_

* * *

**Vargas**

Lovino Vargas is a strange boy, and there are several warnings you should keep in mind before meeting him.

He's a brunette.

He is almost always angry at _something_.

His favorite movies usually involve mafia, espionage and guns.

He has one extremely ditzy twin brother.

And he lives with his grandfather.

He has an incredibly short temper.

He is very over-protective.

His favorite word is 'bastard'.

He hates Spanish.

He's Italian and is addicted to pasta.

And tomatoes.

And pizza.

And lasagna.

Another interesting fact about the eldest Vargas twin, is that he loves photography. But he doesn't enjoy pictures of himself, so few to none of his hundreds of pictures actually have images of himself.

Which is what he was arguing with his brother about as they walked the school hallways to their first period class which they, to Feliciano's delight and Lovino's despair, had together.

"Ve~," Feliciano complained, "But, fratello, you love _taking _pictures! Why not be _in _them?"

"Because…" Lovino searched for a suitable explanation for his feelings towards pictures of himself, however, all he came up with was, "Screw it, I don't know!"

Lovino loosened the tie that had been wrestled on him that morning until it was practically to his bellybutton.

"Ve~, fratello," Feliciano said, "You might as well just take it off if you're gonna loosen your tie that much."

Lovino, deciding this was a good idea, discarded the tie completely, stuffing it into his bag.

Which is exactly why he didn't notice the girl that had been hurrying past him until he smacked into her, scattering his books and hers all over the floor.

"Shit!" Lovino grumbled, "Watch it!"

"_Lo siento_!" the girl exclaimed, making Lovino cringe at the Spanish, "I should have been watching where I was going!"

"Hell, yeah, you should have," Lovino grumbled, starting to collect his things, "Go on to class, Feli," he said to his brother, "No reason both of us should be late."

Feli looked like he wanted to protest, but simply nodded and hurried down the hall.

"I'm so sorry!" the girl exclaimed again, this time in English, "I really should have been watching where I was going!"

Lovino suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. Then thought, _what the hell_? And did it anyway.

Her papers and books collected in a haphazard pile, the girl sat back on her heels and smiled brightly, "I'm Carmen Carriedo. Nice to meet you!"

Lovino rolled his eyes but responded with a short, "Lovino Vargas."

Carmen was staring at him intently with her huge, emerald green eyes and it was kind of creeping him out.

She had curly, chocolate brown hair that reached a few inches passed her shoulders and was tied in a pony tail with a cheerful red ribbon. Said ponytail was currently resting over her shoulder.

Her smile was cheerful and bright, her white teeth a stark contrast to her tan skin.

Looking at her, and taking in the names _Carmen _and _Carriedo_, she pretty much exuded everything Spanish, which was kind of ticking Lovino off.

Just then, the bell rang, making both students jump.

"Shit," Lovino muttered, "Now I'm late for class."

He stood, then turned to Carmen, who was struggling to stand, not flash anyone, and hold a big stack of books at the same time. Sighing, Lovino held a hand out to help her up, which she took gratefully.

"What class are you heading to?" she asked calmly.

"Home Ec," Lovino grumbled, starting to head off down the hallway.

"Me too!" Carmen exclaimed, "And you're going to wrong way. Here, I'll show you!"

And before Lovino could protest, Carmen had grabbed his hand and was dragging the blushing Italian down the opposite direction.

When they reached the door, Carmen opened it calmly, still holding Lovino's hand.

A tall blonde woman had been starting class, but when the door opened, she looked over.

"Morning, Mrs. Beilshmidt!" Carmen said pleasantly.

"_Guten tag_, Carmen," the teacher said.

She took in the Spaniard, then the blushing Lovino, then looked to their still clasped hands.

"I'll let it slide because it's the first day," Mrs. Beilshmidt said calmly, "Now please take a seat."

With all eyes on them, Carmen only released Lovino's hand when they sat in the only two empty desks.

There was a girl with long blonde hair to Carmen's right, and another with long (of all things) white hair directly in front of her.

Lovino was sitting next to a boy with rather long-ish blonde hair that he hadn't noticed until he looked around, trying to spot Feli.

He located him towards the front of the class, sitting next to a rather tall girl with short blond hair and an Asian boy with short cropped black hair.

Hetalia International Academy was a school solely dedicated to supporting international cooperation, though why it had to be in America was beyond Lovino.

As a result, everyone (except, of course, the English speakers) had to learn English. This kind of pissed Lovino off, even though he had learned English as a young child.

But because it was and International Academy, it wasn't odd to find (in first period alone):

Two Italians

A Spaniard

A Canadian (wherever that was)

An American

A French girl

Two Germans

A Hungarian

An Austrian

A Swiss girl

A Brit

A Dutch girl

A Japanese boy

And a boy from somewhere called Liechtenstein.

With only fifteen students it was, admittedly, a little small, but that was to be expected.

Hetalia International (Or just HIA) was a very prestigious, hard to get into school, so the number of students was small.

Lovino noticed that the teacher had started speaking and lazily glanced over.

"-name is Mrs. Beilschmidt," the teacher was saying, looking around the class in a way that was both kind yet firm, "And I will be your Home Economics teacher for the rest of the year. Now, I would like to make it clear that I tolerate _no _misbehavior. One strike, you're out. No warnings. Are we clear?"

Everyone nodded except the white haired girl in front of Carmen.

"Gillian," Mrs. Beilschmidt said warningly.

"Yes ma'am?" the girl called Gillian drawled.

Mrs. Beilschmidt face-palmed.  
"Just…" the teacher said through her hand, "Oh, never mind…"

Lovino raised an eyebrow at this, but ignored it.

The rest of class surmised of reading the syllabus and discussing Mrs. Beilschmidt's goals for the class.

When the bell finally ran (they had shortened classes that day to make time for the assembly that afternoon) Lovino stood lazily and wound his way through the desks to his brother.  
"Feli," Lovino said, getting the attention of his brother who was busy saying something-or-other about pasta to the Japanese student.

"Ve~, Lovi!" Feli said, "This is Kiku! We have art second period together, isn't that wonderful?"

Kiku bowed, saying, "Very nice to meet you."

Lovino grunted in his direction before turning back to his brother, "So you know where the classroom is?"

Feli nodded enthusiastically and started talking again in that rapid-fire way he has.

Rolling his eyes, Lovino turned towards the door, but was stopped when someone grabbed his hand.

Turning around, Lovino found Carmen gripping his hand and smiling happily. Almost instantly, he found the blush burning in his cheeks as he stuttered, "W-what the hell are you doing?!"

"See?" Carmen said, still not releasing the flustered Italian's hand, turning to the two girls standing behind her, "He looks just like a _pequito tomate_! _Muy quelindo, no_?"

Lovino cringed again at the Spanish, but tried to hide it.

The two girls with Carmen were the ones she had been sitting next to in class.

The blonde girl, whose name Lovino still didn't know, was very pretty, almost unnaturally so. She had long, wavy blonde hair that fell in a waterfall to mid-way down her back. Startlingly blue eyes stared up at him through long lashes and Lovino could see a slight dusting of blush on her cheeks.

"So this is _le pettite Italie_?" she said, her French accent evident, she smiled slightly and winked at Lovino (which kind of weirded him out. I mean, who _does _that?!), "My name is Francesca Bonnefoy, but everyone just calls me Frani."

The other girl, Gillian, was less impressed.

She was obviously albino, with colorless skin and hair, and almost creepy ruby red eyes. She was smirking, which seemed to be a permanent facial expression, kind of like Lovino's scowl.

"He looks kind of wimpy," she said offhandedly, "I'm awesome, by the way. But you can call me Gillian."

"Bitch," Lovino muttered.

"What was that, unawesome bastard?" the albino growled.

"I called you a-" he started to say, but Carmen interrupted him.

"Well, you guys need to get to class," she said hurriedly, never faltering in her smile, "_Ciao_!"

"See you later, _mon ami_!" Frani agreed, dragging a furious albino out the door and down the hall.

"What's your next class?" she asked.

"Um…Photography," Lovino said after a quick glance at his schedule.

"Me too!" Carmen exclaimed, "C'mon!"

And she proceeded to drag him all the way to their next class (before the bell, this time) and sit next to him. Again.

After the students had all found seats, the bell rang, and the teacher introduced himself as Mr. Brand.

"As you may remember, when you signed up for this class, I asked you one question: Photographer or Model?"

Lovino nodded. He had remembered thinking that this was an odd question at the time, considering the class was called _Photography _and not _Modeling_.

"Here I have two bowls," Mr. Brand said, holding up two clear goldfish bowls, one labeled 'photographer' the other labeled 'model', "And I will pull two names, one from each bowl. This will be your partner for the remainder of the year. Photographers, I will assign you a theme each Friday. Do what ever you want to the pictures, but I will require a portfolio by the next Friday with at least ten pictures. Extra credit for fifteen. Models, feel free to make suggestions as to your outfit or the setting. A good model can take a word and create a world. A good photographer captures that world in a way that awes the audience. Now, to start choosing."

Guys fist-pumped or 'yes!'ed when they received hot girls.

Girls squealed in delight when they were paired with their friends or cute guys.

"Lovino Vargas," Mr. Brand announced after a while.

Lovino looked up expectantly, not sure whether to be anxious or excited.

"With…Carmen Carriedo!"

Lovino gaped at the Spaniard next to him.

"You signed up as a model?" he demanded.

She smiled sheepishly, "_Si, si_. I enjoy taking pictures, but Frani has always insisted that I could be a model. So I gave it a shot!"

Lovino face-palmed.

"Alright, class," Mr. Brand said, calling the attention back to the front of the room, "The theme is 'Back to School'. Shouldn't be too hard. Remember, I expect your portfolio by next Friday."

Then the bell rang.

"Where're you going next?" Carmen asked.

"Bio," Lovino said after glancing at his schedule.

"I'm headed to P.E.," Carmen said, tearing off a piece of her notebook and handing it to Lovino, "Call me tonight to make plans about when you want to do the shoot. _Ciao_!"

And then she was off, leaving a very stunned Italian in her wake.


	3. Carriedo

A/N: _Ah! Fem!Spain is back! She's so fun. And exactly like regular Spain, but with boobs...moving on. I had a lot of fun with this chapter, hope you like it! (P.S. Hetalia nerd points if you aren't totally confused by the last sentence. My best friend was and I ignored her for a full five seconds out of spite.)_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

**Carriedo**

Carmen Carriedo is one of the happiest people you will ever meet, but it's still helpful to know a few things about her.

She's brunette.

She has wide, emerald eyes that aid in her infamous puppy face.

Her favorite movie is Titanic. She cried. The whole way through.

She has one older brother.

And her mother makes the best churros you'll ever eat.

She's extremely sweet and hardly ever gets angry.

She doesn't get drunk. No matter how much she drinks.

Her two best friends are Frani Bonefoy and Gillian Belishmidt.

She's very tan and _very_ Spanish.

She loves tomatoes.

And churros.

And turtles.

And tomatoes.

And, as of first period, a certain Lovino Vargas has been added to the very long list of things Carmen loves, right up there with football (the real kind, not that stupid American shit) and tomatoes.

Incidentally, Lovino was exactly what she was discussing with her friends while they got ready for gym.

"What did you think of him, _amigas_?" Carmen asked, as she changed into her gym uniform.

"I thought he was an unawesome asshole," Gillian quipped.

"Would you give it up already, _me cher_?" Frani asked, rolling her eyes.

She turned back to Carmen.

"But I have to agree with our angry German that he was a little…uncouth," she said slowly, "Why are you so interested?"

"I don't know, to be honest," the cheery Spaniard admitted, "There's just something…different about him."

"He kinda looked like he couldn't stand you," Gillian said bluntly, earning her an elbow to the ribs from Frani.

"I know," Carmen said, smiling, "But he has to spend time with me."

The other two girls gave their friend raised eyebrows.

"Oh," Carmen exclaimed, "I forgot to tell you! Well, Frani, you know how you told me I would be a good model, so I signed up for Photography?"

The French girl nodded.

"Well, our teacher, Mr. Brand, he's really nice!, well, he assigned us partners for the rest of the school year, one model and one photographer, and Lovino signed up as a photographer, and we got paired together, so he has to spend time with me because we have to do a photo shoot at least once a week," Carmen clarified.

"I'm pretty sure using that many commas in one sentence is illegal," Gillian pointed out, "But I get the awesomeness. Just so long as you don't start dating the unawesome asshole or something."

"Well," the Spaniard said, blushing creeping up her cheeks.

"What the hell?" Gillian exclaimed, "You like that unawesome bastard?"

Frani, however, gave a very girly squeal and attacked her friend in a hug.

"Carmen! _Ma petite tomate _has found _l'amour_!" she said, clutching a blushing Carmen.

"Oh, no you don't," Gillian said adamantly, "Not with that son of an unawesome bitch you don't. You are the sweetest, almost completely awesome, person ever to walk the earth. You deserve someone awesome and kind and considerate and gentlemanly who'll hold the door for you and carry you and other romantic shit like that."

"He is sort of gentlemanly," Carmen said, "Earlier, when we bumped into each other, he seemed mad but he still helped me pick up all my books, then he helped me stand up too."

"That's not being a gentleman," Gillian complained, "That's called having common awesomeness."

"It's a step," Frani pointed out.

"Are you three still dawdling?" said an impatient voice from behind them, "Get your arses moving!"

Frani turned and exclaimed, "_Mon petite lapin_!" before tackle-jumping a very surprised Alice.

"Frani," Alice said warningly, "I have permission from Scottie to knee you in the gut if you don't get the bloody hell off of me!"

Quickly retreating out of kneeing distance, but still staying close, Frani whined, "But, Alice! I've missed you!"

"I haven't missed you at all," the angry Brit said, dusting herself off, "Now you wankers better get moving or the coach is going to whip all our arses."

As the four girls jogged out to the track, Carmen pondered what her friends had said about Lovino.

It was true that in the last three and a half hours that she had known him, he had been continuously scowling. Or blushing (which she found incredibly adorable). And he came off as very crude, considering the cuss words he used and the fact that he seemed annoyed at everything.

But Carmen got the feeling that he was just shy. And self conscious. And that being angry and lashing out at everyone was the best way he could find of…well…protecting himself. Building walls. Covering it up.

And Carmen wanted to be the person that broke through those walls. To find the real Lovino, hiding behind the scowl. She saw the hurt in his eyes, the hurt that no on could touch, and she wanted to fix it.

Drat. Now she sounded like one of Frani's romance novels.

As the girls third period P.E. class was drawing to a close, Carmen drifted in her thoughts.

"Frani-no! No! GET OFF YOU BLOODY FROG!"

"But, _mon cher_, you're so adorable!"

"But, seriously, West. My awesome conquers all, so wouldn't that be a direct way to rid the world of-"

"I SAID GET OFF!"

"Gil, is this conversation really necessary?"

"What? Do you want to talk about your new Italian crush?"

Instantly, Frani and Carmen were at Gillian's side, begging for details about her sister's 'crush'.

"H-he's not my crush!" Gillain's (younger) twin sister, Monica, protested, "He's just in my art class and I was assigned as his model!"

"And he's super hot and Italian," Gillian prompted.

"What's his name?" Frani asked innocently.

"F-feliciano," Monica muttered, blushing furiously.

"That's Lovino's brother!" Carmen exclaimed.

Gillain was suddenly having doubts, "Wait, that unawesome asshole has a brother?"

"They're twins," Monica confirmed.

"_Please_ tell me you haven't fallen for an unawesome asshole too," Gillian begged her sister.

"No, I met him," Alice said, coming up behind the four girls, "He's really nice and cheerful and didn't shut up the whole time I was talking to him. But he didn't curse once."

Gillian looked relieved, "Thank Fritz, that could have been unawesome."

Frani was grinning slyly, "Only the first day of high school and already _l'amour_ is blooming everywhere."

"Speaking of arseholes," Alice interrupted, turning to Gillian, "Who was that bloke you were chasing this morning? What was his name? Um…Alfred, I think."

"Oh, him?" Gillian said lazily, "Just an unawesome ass that insulted my awesomeness. I don't really know anything about him other than that he has an ego as big as West's porn collection-"

A hand was slapped across Gillian's mouth as her sister, blushing a fierce shade of red, tried to quiet her.

The other three girls, used to hearing about Monica's kinks from Gillian, were unfazed and continued talking like nothing had happened.

After showering and changing, the girls continued their talk about the Vargas boys.

"So, Carmen," Alice prompted, "I couldn't help but overhear your earlier conversation. You really going after that arsehole?"

"Course she is," Gillian said, waving her hand airily, "The girl might be batshit crazy, but she never backs down from an awesome challenge."

Carmen rolled her eyes, but smiled at her friend nonetheless.

"I'm not crazy," she countered, "Just…¿_como se dice_?…determined?"

"Don't you give me that awesome Spanish shit," Gillian rolled her eyes, "You know damn well how to speak English."

"I take it, from this conversation," Frani said slowly, "That unless a demigod of some sort wanders in, you aren't going after any guys this year?"

"Damn straight," Gillian said proudly, "And I don't have to unawesomely resort to West's porn or anything."

The hand was once again smacked across Gillian's face, but half-heartedly.

"It's settled then," Frani clapped her hands, "Since the other three of us currently don't have anyone in particular to lus-I mean, _aspire _for-,"

Alice rolled her eyes and muttered something that sounded like, "Sicko."

"-We will help the two of you with your romantic conquests!"

Carmen smiled and Monica turned slightly red.

"So long as we don't repeat the bunny suit incident," Gillian said (all five girls visibly flinched), "I'm awesomely game."

"Then off to Biology!" Carmen announced, leading the way out of the girl's locker room with an invisible sword held aloft.

Or was it an axe?


	4. Beilschmidt

A/N: _Oh, Fem!Prussia...how challenging you are for me. But fun. OMG MATTHEW'S A _BOY_! This never happens with me, people! History in the making!_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

**Beilshmidt**

Gillian Beilshmidt is a very confusing, but frustratingly simple girl and it really helps to know a few things about her.

She's albino.

She occasionally forgets that she's albino until someone reminds her.

Her favorite music genera is heavy metal

She has a younger twin sister named Monica.

And said sister (as she reminds her regularly) has a stick up her ass.

She has a rather long fuse and it takes a lot to get her angry.

But if she explodes, you don't want to be in the room when it happens.

Her best friends are Carmen Carriedo and Frani Bonnefoy.

She really loves Mrs. Carriedo's cooking.

Her mom teaches Home Ec.

Her prize possession is her grandfather's Prussian Iron Cross.

And she is awesome.

Very awesome.

Which is exactly what she was trying to tell everyone as they made their way to fourth period biology.

However, as it always does when Frani's around, the subject had migrated to boys.

"There really are some cute guys in our grade, though," Frani observed, as they entered the classroom, "Rather sexy, dare I say it."

Finding seats, Frani attempted to sit with Alice, who kicked her off her seat, so settled with sitting next to Carmen.

Gillian, also being rejected from sitting next to Alice, found a seat at an empty table just as the bell rang.

"Sexy?" Gillian demanded, "Maybe mildly attractive. But, so far, I have yet to find a boy who even comes close to my standards of se-"

Just then, the door burst open as two boys entered the classroom. One of them, to Alice's disdain, was the very Alfred F. Jones that had run into her that morning.

Frani turned to see why Gillian had stopped speaking when she found her staring, open-mouthed, at the second boy who had just ran in.

"Damn," Gillian whispered, "I take back what I just said."

The boy next to Alfred looked rather similar, though very different at the same time. He had silky, wavy blond hair that stopped a few inches above his shoulders. His round, wire-rimmed glasses were just a little crooked in front of wide, innocent, violet eyes. He was tall and lean, skinnier than Alfred and minus the broad shoulders, but in no way scrawny.

Gillian swore she heard Frani give a quiet "Hononon" in the background.

The teacher raised an eyebrow.

"Mr. Jones, Mr. Williams, may I ask why you're late?" she asked coolly.

"Sorry, Teach," Alfred said, "Mattie almost got ran over and we had a helluva time getting here."

The teacher rolled her eyes, "Take a seat please."

Much to Alice's displeasure, Alfred chose the spot next to her while the other boy, Mattie, slid into the seat next to Gillian.

Gillian gave the boy an incredulous look, still taking in his utter _adorableness_, but apparently had been staring at him because the boy looked alarmed and said, "Sorry! I'll go sit somewhere else-"

"No," Gillian said, a little too quickly, making the boy's eyes widen, "I mean…it's okay. And…uh…there aren't any other seats anyway so…um…"

The boy was now looking at her sort of timidly, but also confused.

Sticking out her hand and wondering just _what _the fuhrer she was doing, Gillian blurted, "Gillian Beilschmidt."

The albino was fairly certain that Frani stifled a laugh, but resisted the urge to hit her.

"Matthew Williams," the boy responded, smiling a little.

He was _so damn cute_!

Gillian was dying to try and start up a conversation with this shy boy next to her, but the teacher was talking.

Damn teachers! Why couldn't they just let the students…talk or something?

"-So please use these worksheets to get to know your lab partner better because they will be you lab partner for the rest of the year," the teacher said, handing out worksheets to the students.

Gillian seriously considered kissing the teacher's feet.

Once the worksheets had been passed out and the class had started talking amongst themselves, Gillian turned back to her adorable lab partner.

"Alright," she said matter-of-factly, "Let's get this shit over with. Question 1: where're ya from? Kay. You first, Birdie."

Mathew looked slightly confused, "My name's Matthe-never mind. I'm from Canada."

"Second biggest landmass," Gillian said, nodding.

Mattie looked surprised, "You know where it is?"

"Sure I do, Birdie," Gillian laughed, "I'm awesome, not stupid. It's right up there."

The girl pointed in a direction that she was pretty sure was north.

Mattie blushed, "It's just that…no one ever seems to know where it is."

"S'fine. And I'll leave all igloo and moose jokes for a later date," after this she ducked as Matthew tried to hit her, but both were laughing.

"So, where are you from?" Matthew asked.

Gillian puffed out her chest, "Well, do you know where Prussia was?"

Mathew nodded.

"That's where my grandfather was from!" Gillian said proudly, "I've even got his awesome Prussian Iron Cross. My sister just tells people she's unawesomely German cause it's easier. But I'm awesome to say otherwise!"

The rest of the worksheet passed much in this fashion and Gillian decided that she really liked this Matthew kid.

Class was drawing to a close and everyone was just talking when Alfred leaned over to talk to Mattie.

"Yo," he called, "Didn't I tell you we wouldn't get in trouble?"

"Al," Mattie sighed, "Not every teacher is just going to roll their eyes because they don't want to deal with you."

Alfred pouted, "But it still worked, didn't it?"

"Who's that?" Gillian asked as Mattie rolled his eyes and turned away from Alfred.

"My brother," Mattie sighed exasperatedly.

"Oh," was all Gillian could think so say, holding back a sigh of relief. She was worried that maybe he was…never mind.

When the bell rang, Mattie waved good-bye to Gillian as his brother pulled him off to get in line for food.

"It looks as though our _petite allemand_ will not be able to help dear Carmen and Monica," Frani sighed dramatically.

"That's _petite prussien_ to you, Frenchie," Gillian said, "And just because I think he's extremely se-_attractive_ does not mean I can't help my sister with her conquest or whatever the hell you want to call it."

"Whatever," Frani rolled her eyes, but she was smiling, "Just remember, _me petite prussien_, we have BFT practice, so you need to focus."

Gillian waved her hand, smirking, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.

Carmen slung her arm around Gillian's shoulder.

"I have a plan," she said, with a grin that could rival the Cheshire cat.


	5. Williams

A/N: _My favorite Canadian is _back_! Yay! By the way, I just realized that I never put up translations as I usually find it unnecessary, but there is a little bit of French in this chapter that some people might find confusing. Google Translate is one of my best friends, I'd be happy to introduce you! Second, I in no way speak fluent French. However, I do know a few basics and the stuff I have in here doesn't seem too off. If you speak French and I'm way off then I'm very sorry._

_P.S. Prussia has __**Ninja Glomps**__!_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

**Williams**

Matthew Williams is a rather quiet person, so it's usually helpful to know things about him before you're officially introduced.

He's blonde.

He has very startling violet eyes.

He hates being forgotten

He has one very obnoxious older (by two minutes) twin brother.

He lives in a very large house which is usually only inhabited by the two boys.

He doesn't get angry easily.

He is usually the designated driver after parties.

He really hates McDonalds.

He has a plush polar bear that he still sleeps with.

He is very Canadian.

And loves hockey.

And maple syrup.

And pancakes.

Which is what he was asking a very confused cafeteria lady about.

"No, I just want to know if you have pancakes," Mattie was saying.

"But it's lunch time," the lunch lady repeated.

"I know that," Mattie said calmly, "But do you have pancakes?"

"But it's lunch time."

"I _know_ it's lunch time. But do you have-"

"Give it up, Mattie," Alfred said, coming around the corner bearing four hamburgers, two baskets of fries, two milkshakes and a very large grin, "They have lots of hamburgers, though."

"No thanks, Al," Mattie sighed, denying the burger offered to him.

Mathew told Alfred to go ahead and went to retrieve a basket of chicken strips and (very) greasy fries.

He was just heading to sit down when he heard a very angry Italian arguing with the very same lunch lady that he had just been talking to.

"_Che diavolo_?" one of the boys demanded angrily, the other boy looked close to tears, "How do you not have pasta?"

The lunch lady was starting to get angry, "I don't know what it is about you freshman but I only have what's on the menu. I don't have pancakes or pasta or any other special orders!"

"It's not special!" the boy argued back, equally angry, "You stick noodles in a bowl of boiling water and then put it on a plate!"

"Well, I don't have it!" the lunch lady was practically shouting.

"Ve~, _fratello_," the crying one muttered to the other, "_Va bene_, I'll have salad or something. They have tomatoes, so it'll be okay, _si, fratello_?"

Huffing, the dark haired boy shot one last death glare at the lunch lady before dragging his brother towards the salad section.

"Are you okay?" Mattie asked, approaching the two boys with a worried expression on his face.

The boy who had been crying, who had copper colored hair and big hazel eyes, looked up at Mattie.

"Back off bas-" the other boy, this one with dark hair and slightly more golden eyes started to say, but when he saw the smile starting to spread over his companion's face, stopped.

"_Si, si, grazie, grazie,_" the copper haired boy said, smiling warmly at Matthew.

"I'd stay away from the fries," Mathew suggested, pointing to his own basket of chicken and fries, "But the chicken isn't half bad. You know, for a cafeteria."

The copper haired boy smiled wider and said, "_Grazie_! I'm Feliciano Vargas, by the way!"

And, to Matthew's extreme surprise, the other boy smiled a little too, "I'm Lovino. We're twins."

Mathew's eyes widened, "Really?"

Lovino's smile quickly turned into a scowl.

"Yeah, I know," he muttered, "How could someone like me be the twin of someone like him?"

"No," Matthew said, shaking his head for emphasis, "Nothing like that. You both seem like very nice people. It's just that I'm a twin too. I thought it was cool that there was another set of twins in our grade. You guys are freshman, right?"

Lovino's eyes had widened, "Nice?" he asked.

"Ve~! _Fratello_!" Feliciano exclaimed, "Someone thinks you're nice!"  
"You think I'm nice?" Lovino asked, turning to Matthew.

Matthew was thoroughly confused but answered anyway, "Of course. I mean, I've only known you for a few minutes, but so far I like you."

"But I was just yelling at a lunch lady," Lovino said, still stunned.

Matthew laughed, "Yeah, I was arguing with her a few minutes ago too. And you were just trying to help your brother."

"Are you the one who was asking for pancakes?" Feliciano asked.

Matthew nodded, "She just kept telling me that it was lunch time, as if you can only have pancakes at one time of day."

"She's obviously never been to iHop," Lovino reasoned.

The Canadian laughed again.

"I'm Matthew Williams, by the way," Matthew said, smiling at the two brothers.

After the brothers had collected their food and were turning to sit down, Feli turned to Mattie.

"Ve~," Feli said, smiling, "Do you mind if we sit with you?"

"Of course!" Mattie said happily, "Just so long as you don't mind-"

"MATTIE! OVER HERE! OI, MAT! GET OVER HERE!"

"That," Mattie finished, rubbing his neck nervously.

"Alfred Jones?" Lovino gaped, "_That's _your brother?"

"I know," Mattie shrugged, "How could someone like me be the twin of someone like him?"

Lovino looked at Mattie, and actually laughed, "You know the feeling, huh?"

"More than you know," the Canadian agreed.

After they had sat down and Mattie briefly introduced the two Italians, Alfred started into a long winded monologue about the school football team (Lovino was mildly interested until he realized that Alfred was talking about _American _football).

Mattie started a conversation with Lovino and the more he found out about him, the more he liked the foul-mouthed Italian and hoped they could be friends.

Mattie was just eating his last fry when a girl's voice from behind them shouted, "LOVI~!"

"You know the feeling, huh?" Mattie asked.

Lovino winced and muttered an "Oh, great," before a blur of red and brown tackled him from behind.

"Lovi~! Who are your friends? Did you forget about me?" the (now that she wasn't hurtling towards her target, Mattie could see that it was a girl) chocolate-haired girl said happily.

"Oi! Don't just tackle people!" Lovino said hotly, attempting to pry the tan arms off of his neck, "And don't call me Lovi! My name is Lovino!"

"Who's _tu amigo_?" the girl asked, turning large green eyes on the Canadian, "I'm Carmen, by the way. Lovi's model."

Mattie smiled and was just saying, "Hi, I'm Matthew," when someone tackled _him_ from behind, this one with no warning.

"Mattie~!" said a voice, white hair falling over Mathew's shoulder as a girl leaned over to see him better, "Why're you flirting with other girls? That's not nice, you know!"

"H-hi, Gillian!" Mattie stuttered, "How're you?"

"I'm awesome," she said.

"Hello bitch," Lovino growled as Gillian turned her attention on him.

"Bastard," she shot back.

The conversation probably would have gone farther had Feli not chosen that exact moment to squeal, "Ve~! Monica!"

"Who's that?" Mattie asked, turning to Lovino as a tall girl with cropped blonde hair and bright blue eyes approached the table, only to be ambushed by Feli.

"My sister," Gillian said, "Monica. She's almost as awesome as me. Or, she would be, if she didn't have such a stick up her ass."

"_Schwiester_!" Monica exclaimed, a blush creeping up her neck.

"That's not a very nice thing to say, _ma cher_," said a very pretty blonde girl, walking up behind Monica.

"Well, it's true!" Gillian protested, she motioned to the blonde girl, "This is Frani, by the way. A.K.A. 'the French goddess'."

"You flatter me, _prussien_," Frani said, rolling her eyes at her albino friend.

She turned to Matthew, smiling, "And you! You're an adorable sight to behold, like a _petite ange_!"

"_Merci, _but I must say that you are the _ange, mademoiselle_," Matthew replied, blushing.

Frani's cerulean eyes widened with surprise and excitement, "_Mathieu_, _vous parlez le langage de l'amour_?"

Matthew blushed but responded happily, "_Je suis Canadien, mais mon papa m'a appris bon français_."

"Would you two please stop speaking Frog?" demanded yet another voice.

All seven turned towards the approaching British accent to find a petite girl with long, blonde, twin ponytails and sharp green eyes behind wire-rim glasses.

"Ally!" Alfred exclaimed, jumping up and smiling at the exact same time that Frani jumped on the girl and shouted, "_Mon petite lapin_, don't be so cruel!"

"GET OFF, FROG!" the girl bellowed before rubbing her forehead and adding, "And my name is Alice, not 'Ally'!"

"This bundle of joy," Gillian added, "Is Alice Kirkland."

Mattie raised an eyebrow at the Brit, then at his brother, "Your lab partner?"

"Yup!" Alfred exclaimed happily.

"Anyway, Lovi," Carmen said suddenly, looking down at the Italian that she was still hugging, "Would it be okay if I came to your house for dinner tomorrow?"

Lovino was in the process of saying something along the lines of '_hell_ no!' but Feli beat him to it with a, "Of, course, Carmen! _Nonno_ would be happy to have you!"

The Italian groaned and stood to throw away his trash (and detach himself a very clingy Spaniard).

"At least you have tomorrow morning to rest," Matthew, who had followed Lovino to the trashcan, said optimistically.

Lovino gave the Canadian an are-you-kidding-me? look.

"Tomorrow is _Friday_," Lovino said, stressing the word as if that mere fact made Mattie's question ridiculous, "I'll be up at five in the morning to garden my tomatoes and then I'll-"

"You garden tomatoes~?" came a familiar lilting accent in their direction, "Lovi~! I didn't know that~!"

"Don't you know it's rude to eavesdrop?" Lovino demanded, sidestepping Carmen, who was once again trying to glomp him.

"It wasn't eavesdropping!" Carmen protested, "Gillian and I were just coming to throw our trash away and overheard you talking! Right, Gil~?"

Mattie didn't even hear the footsteps until a pair of arms were thrown over his shoulders and a voice laughed, "Kesesese~! Course it's not eavesdropping, Car~!"

"Car?" Lovino demanded of Gillian.

"Gil?" Mattie asked, turning a raised eyebrow on Carmen.

"What?" Carmen pouted, "You two both have cute nicknames, why can't we have some?"

"I don't mind-" Mattie started to say but Lovino cut him off with a "We're men! Men are not cute!"

"Aw~!" Gillian cooed, "Did Italian bastard get his pride hurt? Want me to kiss it and make it better?"

Lovino was busy fuming and trying to think of way to get back at Gillian for the comment, but she beat him to it.

"On second thought, there is no way I'm kissing any part of you," Gillian said, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

Lovino let of a strangled yelp of fury but the albino girl was already dragging Mattie away in the direction of the lockers.

"You know," Mattie managed to gasp when they reached their destination and Gillian had stopped her mad dash, "You don't have to act like Carmen. And Carmen doesn't have to be all cutesy for Lovino to like her."

Gillian put her hands on her hips and grinned appreciatively at the still slightly stunned Canadian, "You're sharp kid. I like that."

Matthew was busy grumbling "I'm not cute" but Gillian cut him off.

"So, what are you doing this Saturday?"

"Um…" Mattie thought before turning and smiling, "Nothing, as far as I know. Why?"

"Want to go do something together?" she asked.

Mattie shrugged, "Sure thing."

Gillian winked and started walking towards her next class as the bell rang.

"It's a date," she called over her shoulder, "See you at ten!"

Matthew wondered just what he had gotten himself into.


	6. Bondevik

A/N: _I repeat: I don't own Hetalia (yet...MWAHAHAHA!) and I don't speak Norwegian. Sorry this chapter sort of interrupts the others, but it's important, I promise! For those of you waiting for Mattie and Gillian's date, well...be patient for a few more chapters. I had a lot of fun writing the Nordics (they're some of my favorites. Oh, who am I kidding? They're all my favorites! Except the Asians...don't know a lot about them...) and I'm sorry if they're a little OOC. I also fail at Sweden's accent. I just kind of omitted all of the vowels..._

_But, you did get some DenNor romance-fluffy-ness!_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

**Bondevik**

Lukas Bondevik isn't a very sharing person, so it's rather good to know a few things about him before you meet him.

He's blonde.

He has one very annoying stray curl of hair that just won't stay in place

He is usually very apathetic and hardly ever shows emotion

He has a younger brother named Erik

He lives in a small apartment with his brother and mother

He drinks more coffee than should be healthy

He hates beer.

He has a cousin the same age named Tino who comes over to visit often

He really hates loud people

He's Norwegian and believes in magic

And trolls

And gnomes

And pixies

Which is why he wasn't very startled to see a fairy hovering over the shoulder of a blonde girl he bumped into while leaving the lunch room.

"_Unnskyld meg_," Lukas offered tonelessly to the blonde.

"Oh, no problem," the girl said, smiling slightly.

Lukas recognized a British accent, but was distracted by a sparkle by the girl's ear.

"I think your friend is trying to tell you something," the Norwegian pointed out.

The Brit flashed an annoyed glare in the direction of the offending fairy, "Yes, but I was _trying to ignore you_ because it's very _rude_ to talk while someone else is having a conversation, _Tink_."

Lukas considered that perhaps others might have laughed at the situation, but he really didn't care.

Suddenly, the blonde stopped admonishing the fairy to look at Lukas with a stunned expression.

"Wait…you can see her?" she asked in disbelief.

Lukas gave no sign of confusion or recognition, just a noncommittal nod.

There were footsteps off to Lukas's left before a dark figure tackled him from behind, wrapping it's arms around the Norwegian's slight frame.

"That's my Norge," the figure laughed loudly, "He has this _huge-ass _troll at home, too! Or, so he says. I can't see it. Used to, though!"

Another thing on Luka's list of things he hates: Danes.

All of them.

Or, maybe just one in particular.

Like the one that happened to be draped across his shoulders.

"Mari," he sighed, "Get off."

"But, Norgy!" Mari protested, "I wanna meet your friend!"

"Mari," Lukas repeated.

"Yeah?" The Dane asked, peering around Lukas's head to see his face.

"You're annoying."

A whine started to bubble up Mari's throat, along with a "Norge, you're no fun!" but she was cut off by a looming shadow and a bubbly and accented, "There you two are!"

"I apologize," Lukas said, turning to the blonde girl as three more figures came to join the fray. One, a rather tall blonde woman who seemed intimidating and a small blonde boy. A silver haired boy brought up the rear, looking bored and out of place.

"ALICE!" A voice called, making the blonde girl and Lukas look up, "ARE YOU COMING OR NOT? WE'LL BE LATE FOR CLASS!"

"Coming!" the girl, apparently Alice, called back.

She turned to smile at Lukas.

"I'm Alice Kirkland, by the way," she said.

"Lukas Bondevik," Lukas responded.

The she took off in the direction of four other girls, saying something that sounded like, "You could have just left without me, you know!"

Mari looked over at Lukas, her blue eyes sparkling.

She was around the same height as him, if not a little taller, a point that had always annoyed him.

"The day's almost over, guys!" she exclaimed, "Then we can finally go home!"

Erik's eyebrow quirked at the Danish girl's statement.

"I do hope by 'home' you mean your own respective homes," he said slowly, "As in, the home of Mari. Not the home of Lukas and Erik."

The blonde girl pouted, her short, choppy hair swinging behind her, "You're so cruel Ice!"

"H's n't cr'l, j'st g'ts l'ttl' 'nn'yed w'th y' s'mt'm's," the tall girl muttered.

The bubbly boy laughed nervously, "Don't be mean, Sue! Mari means well, I'm sure!"

Susanne shrugged, "N'v'r s'd sh' d'dn't, Tino."

"Come on guys," Erik sighed, "We'll be late for class if we keep standing around like this."

Mari moved her hand in a fake salute, "Roger, Captain Erik!"

The silver haired boy rolled his eyes and started walking towards his locker, quickly followed by the other teens.

"Hey, hey, Erik?" Mari asked energetically, following the (getting more pissed by the second) Erik towards their lockers, "Aren't you younger than Norge?"

Erik glanced up at the blonde girl, then back at his brother, then back to Mari.

He huffed slightly, "Yeah. I'm almost two years younger. So what?"

"So, shouldn't you be in, like, seventh grade?" Mari continued.

Erik quirked an eyebrow, "I didn't know you could do math."

"Pretty impressive, right?" Mari said proudly, puffing out her chest, "It's-wait. What did you just-? HEY!"

Erik snorted his laughter, speeding up to reach his locker as the first bell rang, alerting the school that they had five minutes to get to class.

"C'mon, Erik," Lukas said, bypassing the Dane in favor of heading to their fifth period class.

"Tino! Ice is being mean again!" Mari whined as the two brothers walked away.

Lukas decided to ignore the rest of whatever Mari was (whining) saying.

He had been feeling weird lately, a problem that he would much rather rectify.

Why was his heart beating so fast?

Could Erik hear it?

Could _Mari_?

It would be the end of him if either of those two found out he was sick.

_Was_ he sick?

He was feeling unnaturally warm, and why was his face burning like that?

Lukas reached up to feel his face, just to make sure nothing was wrong.

"Lukas, you okay?" Erik asked, turning to look at his brother.

"'m fine," Lukas muttered.

The bell rang at around the same time that they reached their classroom and the boys took seats, Lukas finding one at the back of the class and next to a window.

The Norwegian stared out at the sky as he thought about his problem.

It _was _a problem, right?

Maybe he was just imagining things.

A faint flickering to him right made Lukas glance over.

"_Hei, Grønn_," Lukas greeted.

The troll nodded in the direction of the Norwegian in acknowledgement.

The two sat there for a while, enjoying each other's company, (and completely ignoring the teacher, who was feeling frazzled and out of energy after the last four periods of doing the exact same thing) for a few minutes.

Slowly, Lukas turned to the troll.

"_Grønn_," he said, "Do you think I'm sick?"

Silence.

"Yeah, I don't think so either."

Silence.

"Do you think Tino could help?"

Silence.

"You're right. Shouldn't risk Erik or Mari finding out. _Takk_."

And so the rest of the class period passed in relative silence (except the teacher, of course, who was _still _fighting her loosing battle with the students attention).

They exited the classroom again after the bell rang (the teacher had given up, she slumped in her chair and held her face in her hands) heading for their sixth (and last) period of the day.

Erik was heading to P.E. while Lukas had Geometry, so they parted ways. Lukas was almost to his classroom when rapid footsteps to his left alerted him to-

"NORGE!"

Lukas bucked under the sudden weight of his childhood friend.

It was back!

The burning in his face!

Why was his chest hammering like this?

Had Mari given him some sort of disease?

Annoying Dane. He was sure that was the reason for him feeling so weird.

But it was only this way around Mari.

Annoyance was starting to bubble within the blonde Norwegian.

And that's how it stayed all through sixth period, Mari sitting next to him the whole time, and _not shutting up once_.

They were exiting the classroom for the promised assembly when Mari stopped Lukas.

"What?" Lukas demanded.

But then a weird feeling was spreading through his body.

And where had Mari gone?

What was this feeling against his lips?

_Lightbulb_.

Mari was _kissing _him.

Wait…

…what?

But, for some odd reason, Lukas _liked _it.

Liked the feeling of Mari's lips on his own.

Wanted _more_.

Then, just as quickly as she had been there, the Dane was gone, leaving a confused and very flustered Lukas in her wake.

Still shaken up, Lukas turned to go to assembly.

He found Erik, who had saved him a seat, in the sea of people. Tino and Susanne were also there, but someone was missing.

Mari.

"Have any of you seen Mari?" Lukas asked as he sat down with them.

"Not since lunch," Tino shrugged.

Susanne nodded her agreement.

Erik added that he hadn't seen her either.

"What happened?" Erik asked as Lukas took his place on the bleachers.

"What do you mean?" Lukas asked.

"You look…weird."

"What kind of weird?"

All this talking was starting to tire him out.

"Like, sort of happy but sort of confused and annoyed at the same time," Erik elaborated.

Lukas shrugged noncommittally.

What was with this sudden surge of emotion?

If he believed Erik (which he did) he felt almost as weird as he looked.

But, as the principal stepped on stage and started to speak, Lukas could only wonder.

Where was Mari?

AND WHAT THE HELL HAD JUST HAPPENED?


	7. Kapuski

A/N: _There is a reason that this is so late! The reasons are: my teachers hate me, Greece is a loveable jackass who kicked my ass half way to hell and back before I could come up with this piece of really short bullcrap that sits before you._

_Darn you Greece!_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

**Kapuski**

Herkules Kapuski doesn't talk much, so here are a few facts about him before you meet him.

He's a brunette.

He has green eyes that his mother used to say were the color of olives.

He loves to dance, though he does it rarely.

He's an orphan who now lives with his older cousin, Gupta.

He really hates Aaliyah Annan

He's a very good student, although he sleeps through most of class.

He loves the Olympics.

He's very lazy.

He's Greek.

He loves cats.

And napping.

And cooking.

And napping.

Which is exactly what he was doing during the school assembly.

Unfortunately, his least favorite person in the world was trying to wake him up.

"Hera. Hera! Wake up!"

Herkules batted the hand that was shaking his shoulder and muttered something about cats.

"Hera! Herkules! Wake up!"

Olive eyes blinked, tan hands reaching up to rub the sleep out of them.

"W-what…?" Herkules muttered.

Green eyes almost the same shade framed by curly, dark brown hair stared back at him.

"Herkules! Get. Up!" the girl growled.

"Go away, Aaliyah," Herkules muttered sleepily.

"I don't think so," Aaliyah spat, "And stop sleeping during assembly!"

"Why do you care?" Herkules asked, sitting up now, all hope of napping lost.

Aaliyah rolled her eyes, shaking long hair out of her face, "You should pay attention. Just because you can sleep all day and get perfect grades doesn't mean you _should_."

Herkules gave the Turk a quick glare before turning to look at the person speaking.

Other people's conversations floated over to the pair as they stopped bickering.

"I wonder where Mari ran off to."

"N' cl'. Pr'b'bly g't l'st 'r s'mth'ng."

"MY NAME ISN'T ALLY! AND GET OFF, FROG!"

"But, _mon cher_, you're so cute!"

"Stupid Norge…"

Herkules looked up when he felt Aaliyah tense beside him.

"It's that bitch, Khøler," she muttered.

Herkules looked around the Turk to see that there was, indeed, a blonde Dane sitting a few feet away from them on the bleachers.

She seemed to be lost in thought, however, and a strange red hue was covering her cheeks.

Herkules ignored the fuming girl beside him and turned his attention to the front of the room.

"-to HIA and I hope you all have a very good year. Let it be noted that, although we prefer our students to speak English, guidance counselors are available for language help at any time. Now, for the start of term-"

Herkules observed the speaker.

It was the Headmaster. He had a name, he must, but no one knew what it was. All the students simply called him 'Legolas' because of his long blonde hair and expressionless demeanor.

The speech wasn't exactly interesting and Herkules wasn't known for listening when teachers were speaking, so the Greek zoned out.

It wasn't until the bell rang and the headmaster dismissed them that Herkules lazily blinked at the world around him.

Aaliyah was huffing something about how he had better hurry up since Gupta was making her drive him home.

"What's up your ass?" Herkules drawled.

"Nothing," Aaliyah muttered.

Of course, just then, 'nothing' decided to walk past their lockers.

'Nothing', of course, happened to be the school's biggest heartthrob, Kiku Honda. Oh, and there was his older brother, Yao Wang.

Another thing about attending HIA was that everyone at the school was somewhere on the 'extremely attractive' bar. Almost every boy at the school had their own fan club.

Many of the girls too.

In fact, Herkules and Aaliyah were two such fan club owners.

But Kiku and his Asian's siblings were at the top of that 'extremely attractive' bar.

For some reason, every time Aaliyah looked at Kiku, Herkules got this burning anger in his gut.

This was unusual, Herkules was hardly ever angry.

But it would always happen, without fail.

"Come on, let's go," Herkules growled, grabbing Aaliyah's wrist and dragging her to her car.

"Hey, hey! What's up _your_ ass?" Aaliyah demanded, reluctantly pulling out her keys.

"Nothing," Herkules muttered.

"Holy shit," Aaliyah gasped as they climbed into the car, "Are you...angry?"

"I said, it's nothing!" Herkules repeated.

Aaliyah gaped at him, "Hera...you are so totally pissed!"

"Just shut up and drive already," Herkules muttered turning his back on the Turk and facing the window.

What was wrong with him?

Why was he angry?

This was such a new feeling and he wasn't sure what to do about it.

Ordinarily, the Greek would find one of his many cats, curl up and go to sleep.

But something was keeping him from sleeping.

Friggin anger.

Why couldn't it go away?

As soon as they got home, Herkules was out his door and racing to the house.

"Hera! Oi, Hera!" Aaliyah shouted, following close behind.

Gupta looked up from his computer when Herkules entered the house, "Welcome home-,"

"I'm going to do homework!" Herkules shouted, racing up the stairs.

Aaliyah was second through the door, "Where'd he go?" she demanded.

Gupta hid a smile, "He went to his room to do homework."

"Little bastard," Aaliyah growled, racing up the stairs after him, and stopping to pound on his door.

"Hey! Brat!" she shouted, "Lemme it!"

"I'm doing homework! Go away!" Herkules called from the other side of the door.

Aaliyah rattled the door handle, "You brat! Get out here and tell me what the hell's wrong!"

"Go _away_!"

"Grah!" Aaliyah screamed, "You son of a-! You know what? Fine, you little brat! Fine!"

Herkules let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding as he heard the stomping of Aaliyah's boots down the stairs.

"Something wrong?" Gupta asked as Aaliyah dropped unceremoniously onto the couch.

"Hell yeah, something's wrong!" she grumbled, "First, that little piece of shit sleeps during the assembly, then he drags me to the car before I can talk to Kiku, then he gets _angry_ of all the absurdity, and now he won't tell me what the hell is going on!"

The Egyptian gave Aaliyah a sideways look.

"Herkules was angry?" he asked.

Aaliyah threw up her hands in frustration, "I know!"

"Why do you think he's angry?" Gupta asked, looking back down at his book.

"I don't know- wait? What are you? Some sort of shrink?" Aaliyah demanded, crossing her arms and glaring at the wall.

"Not exactly," Gupta muttered, looking back at his book.

"That's it," Aaliyah muttered, "I'm stuck in a house with a silent Egyptian shrink and a PMSing know-it-all Greek. Fan-friggin-tastic."

"You forgot the dog," Gupta added, not looking up from his book, "And the cats."

"Oh! God forbid I forget the cats!" Gupta could practically hear Aaliyah roll her eyes at the wall, "Who could forget the cats?"

Almost as if he had heard her, one of the aforementioned furry animals jumped onto her lap.

"Do these things even have names?" Aaliyah demanded holding up a fuzzy orange kitten.

"Course," Herkules muttered as he snatched the cat from Aaliyah, "This one's Niem."

"I thought you were doing homework," Aaliyah asked, turning her glare on the back of the retreating Greek.

"I'm hungry," Herkules said matter-of-factly, "Sue me."

Aaliyah stood and followed Herkules into the kitchen.

"What if I do?"

"Where would you get the money?"

"How about your bank account, brat."

"I'm broke."

"I know."

"No you don't. I was lying."

"You little brat!"

Gupta smiled knowingly.


	8. Khøler

A/N: _I'm so sorry for the late update but I was working on _Gender Confused_ (advertising) and school is killing me! Plus, I'm not very familiar with writing the Nords. It's easier when it's nations I'm comfortable with (America, S. Italy, Canada, Prussia etc) so Mattie and Gil's impending date will definitely be better._

_Because my inconsistency has been driving me mad, I think I'm going to try and update every Sunday. Sound good? Yes? No? Maybe so?_

_Anywho...enough of me rambling about my woes, read my story!_

**Edit:**_Guess what I realized upon re-reading? Mari goes to first, second and third period, skips fourth, then proceeds to go to...third period? Hehe -nervous neck rub- fixed that little glitch.__  
_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

Mari Khøler is very rambunctious and loud and you probably know way too much about her already, but here's some more information.

She's blonde.

She has eyes the exact color of Peter's favorite turquoise crayon.

She loves babysitting and wants to have her own kids someday.

She loves to drink beer, good beer. (So what if she's under age? Screw you.)

She grew up with the Bondevik boys.

She chopped all her hair off the summer of seventh grade, decided she liked it and has kept it that was every since.

She has boobs, knows it, and loves to flaunt them.

She really really hates Aaliyah Annan.

She's an amazing baker but a terrible cook.

She's Danish and loves fish.

And mermaids.

And boats.

And fairy tales.

Which is why she was reading one instead of paying attention to her social studies teacher.

Mari had often wished when she was younger that she was a character in a fairy tale.

The Dane would be the prince, naturally.

And Norge could be the princess!

She had believed that until Aaliyah had pointed out that no one would be stupid enough to let Mari be their knight.

But, as much as Mari hated that annoying Turkish bitch, she had a point.

Who would want to be her prince, much less her princess?

Of course not the silent, apathetic Lukas.

Even though she l-

L-lo-

L-lo-v-e

You know what?

Fine!

She loved him, alright?

Mari was completely, totally, hopelessly in love with Lukas Bondevik!

There!

She said it!

That's why she had kissed him.

She couldn't help it!

He had just looked so confused and lost.

And so incredibly cute!

Besides, it was kind of romantic.

She had given her first kiss to her childhood best friend/love interest.

…but he didn't know that.

And he probably didn't return the feelings.

…Well this sucked.

"Hey, Mari?"

Mari's head jerked up to find Tino staring at her and students packing up their bags to go to their next class.

"Y-yeah?" she asked.

"What's wrong with Lukas?" the blonde tilted his head sideways on the last word.

The Dane's face flushed a bright red.

"W-why do you think I would know?" Mari stuttered, "It's not like I'm his keeper and N-norge can take care of himself so why do you ask, anyway?"

Tino still looked confused, "Well, he was showing more emotion this morning than I think he shows in a year."

"W-well, it's not like anything happened between us or anything so I have no clue what could have caused him to show emotion or anything and you shouldn't ask me and-" Mari stopped, giving Tino a weird look, "But did he look…happy? Or…um…completely disgusted and/or terrified? Or like he was planning on murdering/never talking to ever again a certain–not to be named–person?"

Tino raised an eyebrow.

"Not that I'd care!" Mari added quickly, "Just out of curiosity!"

The Finn considered the question.

"Sort of confused and sort of happy but also sort of angry," Tino decided, "Does that help?"

Mari nodded, slinging her bag over her shoulder and hurrying out of the classroom.

She spent the next two periods thoroughly avoiding Lukas, until she was heading to fourth period and-

"Mari! Mari! Wait up!"

The Dane froze.

She was fairly certain that she'd just heard _Lukas_ shouting her name.

But that didn't add up because 'Lukas' and 'shouting' didn't go in the same sentence.

Ever.

A hand on her shoulder stopped her.

Deep blue eyes captivated her as Mari turned to see the one person she really didn't want to talk to.

Lukas Bondevik.

"Mari, I need to talk to you," the Nord told her.

"But I have to get to class-!" she protested.

Lukas snorted.

"Since when do you care about getting to class? Ever?" Lukas demanded.

Mari couldn't think of any times off the top of her head, but that didn't mean it couldn't happen.

"Follow me," Lukas said, grabbing the Dane's hand and dragging her down the hall.

The two swung into a quiet looking room, filled with books and a bored looking librarian who "Shhhh!"-ed them.

Lukas pulled Mari behind a bookshelf and put his hands on his hips.

"Okay," he said, "Spill."

Mari was still getting over this oh-so-very not Lukas attitude, but decided not to worry about it too much.

"Um…about what?" the blonde asked, blushing.

"You kissed me then run away and left me to crash sometime in the next few days from over-emotion,"

Lukas rolled his eyes.

Mari scratched the back of her neck nervously.

"Oh, that," she smiled half-heartedly.

"Don't give me an 'oh, that' shit," Lukas demanded angrily. (Again: Lukas showing emotion. Mind. Blown.)

"Well, see, it goes like this," Mari said before she could stop herself.

The librarian hissed "Shhhh!" at them and Mari muttered "Sorry!" before turning back to Lukas.

"I fell in love with this very introverted person, he's been my best friend since forever, see," she said,

"And then I kiss him and run away because I have no clue what I had just done."

Lukas crossed his arms, nodding, "That makes sense…I guess. It also really seems like it would suck."

The Dane hummed seriously, "Yeah, the suckish department is way up there. On the plus side, he's cute."

"Don't call me cute," Lukas deadpanned.

Mari feigned surprise.

"What makes you think I'm talking about you?" she asked, "Gosh, Lukas, you're so vain. Not everything's about you, you know."

"And not everything's about you either, annoying Mari," Lukas said, "I'm confused too."

"Really?" Mari asked, "Then what's with- oh! Is that why you've been all emotional and shit?"

Lukas rolled his eyes.

"No, Mari. Because showing emotion is so normal for me," he said sarcastically.

The Dane stared at him for a moment before suddenly hugging the blonde boy, "Lukas, you're back to normal!"

"SHHHHH!"

"Sorry!"

"Mari?"

"Yes?"

"Get off."

But instead of whining "You're so mean, Norge," and backing off like she normally did, Mari only said "Nope. I don't think I will!"

The close contact and mental confusion were a little too much for Lukas as he repeated, "Mari, get off or I swear I will-"

"Nope!"

"Last chance," Lukas warned.

Mari laughed, "What're you gonna do, anyway Nor-"

But she couldn't say anything else because Lukas had punched her arm.

"Ow!"

"Shhhhh!"

"That's for confusing me," Lukas said calmly.

"Norge! That's not nice-!"

The Norwegian grabbed Mari's shoulders and kissed her.

The two only broke apart when Mari made a rather loud noise and the librarian said "_SHHHHHHHHH!_"

"That," Lukas told her, "Is for everything else."

Mari rolled her eyes, "Lukas, you are so confusing and cheesy and weird. And I know that that's from How to Train Your Dragon."

"So? I changed it," Lukas pointed out.

Mari grinned.

Lukas put his hands on his hips.

"So," he asked, "Are we going to try and make this work?"

Mari grinned at him, "Damn straight we are. What're you doing Saturday?"

The blonde boy rolled his eyes.

"What I do every Saturday. Sleeping in and trying to keep Erik from murdering you. Why?"

Mari grinned mischievously, "Because we're going on a date."

Mari spent the rest of the period reading books in the library (fairy tales, of course) and hiding from the librarian after she told Lukas he was her Princess, making him protest, and the angry woman had looked about to murder them.

She couldn't exactly remember when, but when the bell finally rang and the two were heading to lunch, her fingers had somehow wiggled their way between his.

Lukas had blushed scarlet and refused to look at her, but he didn't shake off her hand.

When they entered the cafeteria, successfully locating their friends, and sat down Tino gave Mari a knowing look, Susan's lips twitched in what must have been her version of a smile and Erik made a noncommittal noise in the back of his throat.

A few bites into his sandwich, Lukas whispered, "Why is Tino looking at me like that?"

Mari just laughed.


	9. Zwingli

A/N: _I'm deeply sorry that this chapter is so late and short! But the next one will be out really soon (promise!)_

_To surmise my life since I last posted: I'm failing Geometry, have serious attention issues, and I absolutely  
_adore_ Halloween. Oh, and I decorated our house all by myself. Yay!_

**Warning: Genderbending Ahead**

* * *

Noah Zwingli is quiet boy so I recommend knowing a few things about him, should you meet him.

He's blonde.

He keeps his hair rather long for a boy, at round his jaw line.

He's an orphan and was adopted by the Zwingli's when he was five.

He adores his older sister, Selina.

He loves flowers.

He's usually quiet but can be rather loud when he wants to be.

He likes his older sister's friends and has particularly good relationships with Gillian, Elizabeth, Daniel and Monica (this annoys Selina).

He calls Selina 'sister' though he wishes she would see him as more than a 'brother'.

He's from Liechtenstein and is sad when people don't know where that is.

He likes picnics.

And mountains.

And birds.

"Gillian, I swear–Elizabeth, stop rolling your eyes–just because you see a cute guy–"

"Extremely _hot _guy."

"_Schwiester, _please–"

"Keseseses~!"

"Monica, seriously, your dad is going to _freak_. _Again_."

"Eliot is right. _Vati_ barely tolerated you skipping out on him last week-"

"Keseseses, seriously, West, I'm the awesome _Gillian_! Have more faith in me!"

"Gillian, I think we can all agree that the words 'having faith' and 'Gillian' don't go in the same sentence."

"So what, Specs? Maybe you could see just how _awesome_ I am if your head was so up your a-"

"Finish that sentence, Gillian, I dare you."

"Really Elizabeth?" Eliot sighed and rubbed his forehead, "Just take he bait, why don't you?"

Noah tugged on the taller boy's sleeve, curiosity winning over his tendency to be shy.

"What's Gil so upset about, Eli?" he asked, green eyes confused.

"She's-…it's just that-…how does she-…?" Eliot fell silent in his attempt to describe the situation and instead resolved to facepalm repeatedly.

Noah watched him in interest before concern for his foster brother's face won out and he grabbed Eliot's hand and pulled them away from the bickering girls.

Eliot gave him a grateful half-smiled that turned out more as a grimace.

"Mr. Beilshmidt is having a dinner on Saturday with two important executives to discuss a donation to the school," the Hungarian explained, "But Gil, the idiot, has a date and is going to skip out."

Both Noah and Eliot stared at the albino for a minute before looking away, "Can't she just finish her date and then go to the dinner?" Noah asked curiously.

Eliot sighed, "You know Gil, can't do anything half way. If she's gonna skip, she's gonna skip and be damned if she doesn't do it with flare."

Noah and Eliot wandered away from the group of girls, Eliot muttering about his friend's stupidity, Noah thinking.

Why _schwiester_ Gil was being so stubborn about this confused him.

In Noah's opinion, making other people happy was more important that pleasing yourself. He had never understood how people like Gil could put themselves first all the time. His mind just didn't work like that.

School was over, so when Noah spotted Selina, he ran over to her.

"Hey, Noah," she said, smiling a little.

Noah noticed the way her forehead was creased and she kept rubbing the back of her neck worriedly.

"Are you all right, _schwiester_?" he asked, concerned.

Selina looked startled, then smiled, this one real, at her little brother.

"I'm fine, Noah. I just…just really hate school," she confessed, "You know how much I hate being boxed up like this. I just feel so vulnerable!"

Noah hugged his sister (he was very proud that he now reaches her shoulders) and muttered, "I'll, protect you Selina."

And he said it in such a serious tone, Selina didn't dare doubt him.


	10. Jones

A/N: _Here's the next chapter, out really soon, as promised. So, I kind of make Lars my own character whenever I write him (P.S. he's at least a sophmore...or junior, haven't decided yet). I know that most of the characters are freshman just because I didn't want to have to deal with Gillian's impending graduation, and I wanted her to have classes with Mattie. My brain is confusing. And I haven't decided if I'm going to bother with why one twin is 'Jones' and the other is 'Williams'. It'll probably be something like "Our parents thought it would be cool"._

* * *

Alfred Jones is a very loud person and you'll probably know his life story within the first few minutes of meeting him. Here's some other information, nonetheless.

He's blonde.

He has bright blue eyes in contrast to his brother's bright violet.

He hates scary movies but watches them anyway (with Mattie in the room, of course)

His younger twin brother is Matthew Williams.

He loves science and math.

He also loves quoting things.

Most people think he's loud and obnoxious.

He usually _is_ loud and obnoxious.

As of yesterday, he really likes Alice Kirkland.

He's the hero.

He's cool.

You're jealous.

And there's nothing you can do about it.

"Seriously, Mattie, you're going on a _date_ with _her_?" Alfred demanded.

"Yes, seriously-" Mattie tried to explain to his brother, but Alfred cut him off.

"I just can't believe this! She's so…so…irritating! And…shit, Mattie, why Gillian Beilschmidt?" Alfred continued.

"You've only known her for less than a day-" the Canadian tried to point out, but he was ignored once again.

"_You_ are going on a _date_ with _Gillian_ _Beilschmidt_!"

"Yes," Mattie sighed, "I'm also getting a tattoo of Tom Cruise on my butt this afternoon and I'm a pretty pink pony that enjoys prancing on rainbows."

An arm was slung over Mattie's shoulder, "I heard 'Tom Cruise', 'Pink ponies' and 'prancing'. I'm so in."

Alfred stopped his ranting long enough to stare at the new arrival in annoyance.

Mattie sighed at the not-so-stranger (but definitely strange), new comer.

"Lars, I was kidding," Mattie said, turning to his spiky-haired friend.

"No shit you were kidding," Alfred said, "There is no way I'm letting my little brother get a tattoo of _Tom Cruise_. You'll regret it for the rest of your life."

"_That's_ the part you were concerned about?" Mattie demanded as Lars snickered.

"Anyway, where's Bella?" Alfred asked Lars, who rolled his eyes.

"Admiring the eye candy," the Dutchman pointed behind him to where the girls were fawning over boys, all Asian and all gorgeous.

Mattie studied his friend's face.

"You know," he said slowly, "You'll have to ask her out _someday_."

"And you'll have to get laid someday," Lars pointed out, "I will when you do."

Mattie blushed a fierce scarlet and started protesting but Alfred interrupted with a "Might happen sooner than we think. He's got a date tomorrow."

"A date!" Lars exclaimed, then he pulled Mattie into what both brothers knew was an excuse to give him a nuggie, "_Aww_! Little Mattie's growing up!"

Alfred watched in amusement for a while until Mattie's pleas of "Al…_help…_!" became more persistent and he figured he might as well save his brother.

After Mattie's head had been successfully saved, the three boys made it out of the building, heading to Lars' car.

"You know," Lars said conversationally, "Matt's gonna get his permit before you, Alfred."

The older twin muttered something under his breath that made Lars laugh.

"It's all _his_ fault!" Alfred exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger at Mattie.

Mattie raised his arms in defense, "Just because I decided to take drivers ed instead of trying out for football doesn't make it my fault!"

Alfred continued to pout the entire way to the Jones household.

All three boys went inside, Lars leading the way in like he lived there (which he did, most of the time) and instantly attacking the fridge.

The twins both grabbed a snack (an apple for Mattie, a brownie for Alfred) and flopped down on their overly-large sofa.

"I'll never understand why your parents bought such a huge house in the first place," Lars pointed out, as he did almost every time he came over.

Alfred turned on the TV, seeing if there was anything ESPN, which ended in a fight for the remote between him and Lars.

Mattie, used to the commotion, pulled out his homework.

Thirty minutes later, Lars was successfully watching soccer, Alfred was rooting for the other team out of spite, and Mattie had finished all his homework.

He passed the answering machine and checked it incase their parents had called.

"_Hey, boys,_" came their dad's voice, "_Just want to let you know that Mom and I will be back tomorrow night, but we have an important meeting with an investor before we can get home. Love you!"_

Mattie shrugged. Nothing new.

The Canadian sat down just as Lars' team scored a goal, and Alfred groaned in defeat.

"Mom and Dad will be home tomorrow," Mattie informed his brother, who nodded appreciatively before returning to the game.

Mattie settled on wondering what he would do on his date the next day.


End file.
